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Tickets, anyone? They're just $5 each. Seriously. I don't need to sell any, but my friends do. Tickets, anyone? They're just $5 each. Seriously. I'm promising a relatively good show, if you cut out the Deepavali special. No offense to them, they're just primary school kids. Tickets, anyone? The Physical Theatre Festival is beckoning. Tickets? -2313, 29-7-09 So what's up? I just finished my ECONnect. I taxed my brain doing it. And now my father is asking me to go to sleep based on: Me using the computer too much. Me not feeling well due to a red eyes induced from a flu this morning, and a running-nose induced by spicy food from dinner, which equates to a flu caused by spending hours on end in front of pixels and a fluorescent screen. Me having too much fun. Ok, ok I made the last one up. But he might as well have said it. I don't blame him, but don't assert yourself over me now. Not after you've neglected me for so long already. -2246, 28-7-09 So am I the friend of the hated, or the hated friend? -2019, 27-7-09 I'm in a slump, yet again. -1916, 26-7-09 We are the beginning. And we are here to stay. Ark of heaven, slice of sea, sliver of lake, sway of trees. Vision shifts, new laws, strength, will, mastery. -0015, 26-7-09 I am a writer, or at least I want to be. But I hardly have knowledge of subjects, of proper past tenses and fragmented sentence structures. My spelling is mediocre (see what I mean?), my description tasteless, my grammar unexcellent. And my style, my essence, my inspiration, is all a pale grey. -2138, 24-7-09 Sweet tunes pour out the many tiny pores in the metal's surface. While listening intently to meaningful lyrics sung in harmony by the two vocalists, my fingers, barely blistered and hence concealing the fact that they are sore from writing all day, are only just able to fly across the different panels, marked with letters, numbers or symbols. Applying pressure, I witness the formation of pixel after pixel, letter after letter, word after word, as I gulp and feel a soreness in my throat -- it is not dry, but it seems like everytime I exhale I can feel the arid atmosphere of the Sahara escaping my larynx. Flimsy magazines are strewn across the wooden table to my left and right; meanwhile wires criss-cross each other like the beelines often witnessed as students queue for their meals, but at least there is no buzz. I lazily finish off the last sentence, and as I hit enter, a little white pop-up at the bottom of the screen lights up, accompanied solely by a barely audible 'ping'. I glance at it, see "Miyami | When..." The sing has ended, a new one plays. You're so hypnotizing You've got me laughing while I sing You've got me smiling in my sleep And I can see this unravelling Your love is where I'm falling But please don't catch me -2256 22-7-09 So here I am taking a break. I can't say my progress is great. It can't be; I haven't done much. But I'm guessing that's why my life sucks. I read an article on sloth, one of the seven ways to drive the world to ruin. I thought it could shed some light on this predicament I'm in. But it told me the opposite of what I'd expected. The lack to do what helps others. Is what I've been doing. And I'm neglecting my own work. I found it really amusing. And my heart is once again sinking. I think I just need to find the answer. Soon. Or else the shit I'm in keeps piling up. And I sure as hell don't want to stink. -1016,19-7-09 I think I need to see a therapist. -1625,18-7-09 Its obvious. That I'm not dealing well. Not right now. -10.40p.m, 17-7-09 So what am I doing home on a Friday night? For some reason, this Friday, today, seems more special than other Fridays. For some strange reason, I am compelled to be spending my time out tonight, whereas other nights I would be content leaping off tall buildings and ripping the organs out of computerised pixels. For some reason, this Friday is no ordinary Friday. So what am I doing home on a Friday night, mulling over the circumstances of my 4 concurrent predicaments? Hot stuffz. -7.01p.m, 17-7-09 It's a matter of brain against heart. And after a long time of subduing emotions and reasoning with logic against fallacies of thought, I am forced to relook the current situation. So what is it? I like her, but I don't want to? I don't like her, but I want to? It's a fine line to choose, and in the end it's ironic that my brain thinks through all the circumstances, and chooses to follow my heart. I don't like her, but I want to. But it's forced and it'll never happen. And I'm not sad it'll never work. I'm enlightened actually. So I choose no. And live with the choice. With inumerable, grateful thanks to my grandmother's brother's granddaughter. -5.00p.m, 16-07-09 Life is a funny thing. We glare at the ones who live like kings And glance at the one who live like dirt Quick, illogical judgement tells us to stray towards those Who seemingly have no problems Who seemingly live in luxury Who seemingly never work, only play And still get the rewards Quick, illogical judgement tells us to leave behind those Who seemingly worry daily about poverty Who seemingly have nothing to fill their stomachs Who seemingly always work, never play And still get the consequences I glare at myself And glance at myself Then tell myself If I am here, since I am here, when I am here Life is a funny thing. -11.02p.m, 14-7-09 We can lay here forever under the stars in your arms. Forget about the world spinning on its axis. We exist. -8.20pm, 13-7-09 I went to look at pictures, to find reasons to hate her. Or at least not love her anymore. And what I saw made my heart crash. Because I might as well have fallen all over again. Time changes people, and great minds falter But in the context of eternity, fools never differ. - 12.08 pm, 12-7-09 Talktothewalls. Amazingly sweet and powerful voice, excellent guitar playing in keeping to beat, superb ability to isolate singing and the guitar, and pretty to boot. -6.28p.m, 10-7-09 A day of disappointments just lowers expectations of happiness. And lowered standards makes for joyous celebrations. But joyous celebrations imply improvements, and again the cycle of dissappoinment follows. told myself. not to get involved. and look where getting involved, got me involved. -10.27p.m, 8-7-09 Things to do: 1. Find a way to get rid of my old Yamaha electric guitar. 2. Find a way to get rid of my brother's broken bass guitar (or fix it up). 3. Find a way to clean up my electric guitars if I don't do 1 and 2. 4. Tidy up the snaking wires aorund the amps. 5. Find a way to get rid of my current classical guitar (or fix it up). 6. Buy a new acoustic guitar. 7. Pledge to take good care of all my guitars. 8. Pledge to keep the pledge in 7. 9. Learn new songs. -10.01p.m, 3-7-09 |